Several weeks ago I asked for individuals to provide me with a subject to write on.  From one of my readers I received the following question.

“You speak in your blog of making intentional changes.  Can you identify any unintentional changes that you later identified as a bad habit?  And, can you recall any details of how they got there?”

Over the years, like many, I have had my share of bad habits.  I was a chain smoker for over a decade.  I used to drink a gallon or more of regular Coca-Cola a day.  I have been a nail biter since the earliest days of my self-awareness.  The list goes on.

Habits are a funny thing. Whether good or bad, habits they are formed via a “habit loop”.  You have a trigger, followed by the behavior itself, and then the reward.   Once these habits are formed, we can complete the action without even being aware we are doing it.  As a smoker there were innumerable times, I would light a cigarette and smoke nearly the whole thing, before I was consciously aware I was smoking.  The habit was so ingrained, the decision-making and awareness portions of your brain aren’t involved in the process at all.

Nail biting is another habit that is 100% autonomous of the mental decision-making process.  The only instances in which I am aware I am biting my nails is when someone points it out.

Habits can work as a coping mechanism.  For example, I realized early on after picking up smoking, it was the perfect social escape for me.  I used to be loaded with social anxiety.  Large social gatherings, parties, bars, and any other venue where I didn’t know a good number of people caused a great deal of anxiety.  Smoking provided me with an out.  It’s completely acceptable to excuse yourself from nearly any social situation to “have a smoke”.

Following the habit loop model.  Social situations made me uncomfortable, trigger. I excused myself to smoke, habit.  I was free from the social situation, AND, I also got the buzz from the nicotine. Double reward.

To touch on a habit that entered my life without a lot of conscious thought.  About 7 years ago, I drastically cut my caffeine intake.  I had read a fair amount of information on the potential long-term health effects of habitual caffeine intake.  I decided I would cut way down on my caffeine intake.  No small feat really, I generally drank 3 cups of coffee over the course of the morning.  At lunch I would have a diet coke.  The afternoon would be another diet coke or two or three.  Followed by Ice tea or another diet coke in the evening.

I switched from regular coffee to decaf coffee.  I gave up all caffeinated cola beverage.  The one item I didn’t give up was iced tea.  After experiencing 3 solid days of headache and fatigue, I started feeling better.  My energy levels returned.  I discovered I slept a lot more soundly.  An unintended result I noticed within a week of cutting my caffeine intake, my day-to-day anxiety levels were drastically reduced.  I felt much more relaxed, and situations in which my anxiety would spiral nearly out of control greatly diminished.  In short, I felt great.

When breaking any habit, diligence is required.  If you become complacent, the old habit can rear its ugly head.   In the case of caffeine, I was hugely successful.  I felt great, recovered from withdrawals and never really looked back.

Several years passed and all was well.  Then one morning, after several days of unrestful sleep and long days, I ordered a half-caf latte at Starbucks. I went from dragging to focused and productive.  Over the next several days, the poor sleep continued.  And over the next several days, I continued ordering half caf lattes.  The next week, even tho my restful sleep returned, I was still dragging in the morning.   I kept at the half-caf lattes from Starbucks. Then around 10 am, I started making a regular coffee at work.   Within a month, my old routine had returned.  I was back to drinking 3 cups of regular coffee in the morning.  Fortunately, I refrained from adding the diet cokes.  Instead I would have a cup of coffee after lunch.

Three or four years of refraining from caffeine were interrupted within a months time.  My old habit had returned.  My high anxiety returned.   The habit had crept back in.   Having learned the benefits a restricted caffeine diet provided for me, my relapse was only a couple of months long.  I was soon back on the wagon.

Habits come and go.  The important take away is this: living conscientiously, and regularly evaluating what we do and why, makes all the difference.  While, habits and “autopilot” serve a huge benefit in life.  It’s important to evaluate our behaviors from time to time to ensure they are benefiting us, and not hindering or harming us.